Food for thought

Thursday, October 16, 2014

I have been contemplating whether or not to post this... but it is constantly on my mind, so here goes nothing.

Right after I got married, I immediately began hearing the question, "When are y'all going to have kids?" Don't get me wrong, I have asked people the same thing plenty of times. However, in the last few years my eyes have been opened to how common infertility is. When I was younger, I never once considered the fact that me and my future husband may struggle to have children, or may not be able to have children at all. I have always foolishly had my life carefully planned out [as God laughs at me and shakes his head]. "After I graduate I will find my dream job, wait ___ years then get pregnant..." [enter perfectly thought-out life timeline here]. As I have grown up and have friends/relatives entering this exciting phase of their lives, I have sadly realized that infertility is reality for many couples.

My sweet, healthy, 24-year-old friend is currently struggling with this nightmare. At such a young age with no health problems, you would never assume that you would have trouble getting pregnant. However, this is what she is facing daily. Talking to her about her doctor's appointments and medicines makes my heart hurt for her and for all the other ladies out there desperately wanting a baby.

It seems so unfair. We have teenagers getting pregnant by accident yet older women try for years and years unsuccessfully. Life is not fair sometimes. I pray nightly for all these women and selfishly for my own future whenever we decide the timing is right to have kids. Knowing people personally that are struggling with this has made me more aware of how lightly this question is thrown around. I no longer ask women "when are you going to have a baby?" because they could be in the middle of this infertility nightmare.

This medical issue is one of the many reasons I am so passionate about medicine. Next year I will spend one of my clinical rotations in Women's Health/Infertility to learn more about how to treat this terrible problem. I hope to one day be able to help at least one couple going through this.

If you or someone you know is facing infertility, know that I am praying for you. Praying for God's perfect timing, for patience, and for your future babe!


  1. Owen... this hits too close to home. My best friend and matron of honor lost her baby 2 weeks before our wedding. She was 5 1/2 months pregnant. Another best friend and her husband have been trying for 16 years and cannot get pregnant. I put up a rough exterior because... I'm not 100% sure if I want children or not. But that's also because I don't think I'll be able to based off of family history and some medical problems I've had. I am petrified and don't like that question. I never ask anyone that question because I hate when it's asked of me. I hope you are the change! :) xoxo

    1. Oh goodness Meg I am so sorry. IF you decide you want kids, don't let that fear stop you from trying. Medicine is amazing these days. G and I have already had to overcome obstacles before we even started trying, not sure I want to make those details public yet but I would love to talk to you about it if you ever want to! Praying for you!

  2. I love this. I write a Fertility Prayer Project on my blog that I started last year and I write for a fertility magazine. We are on year 10 of trying, and miscarriages. Tears that I often think have dried up..come when least expected.

    1. Wow I am so sorry. It is so unfair. Praying for you!


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